whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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