I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
