Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
