guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
