toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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