Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
