I hate all girls vehemently.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
