Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
