There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
