When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
