I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
