I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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