Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Randomize
