I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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