the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
