I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
