so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
