I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize