I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
time to smoke my breakfast
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
