ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
