I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
