I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize