It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
