absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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