i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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