If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
