Sponge bath it is.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize