I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
