it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
