just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
