Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
