Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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