I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
then he tried to convert me to islam
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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