lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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