so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
