Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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