Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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