i think my mom watched the whole time
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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