CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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