he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
