There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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