its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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