Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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