I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
