tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
