I must be too annoying 4 u.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I have feelings that need drinking.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
