I just made out with a guy for $7.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Life is so much better after having sex.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
