i wish starbucks made bloody marys
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I enjoy the company of your penis
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
