I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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