margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
